Kairos Read online

  Tonya clears her throat, and we both turn and look at her expectantly. She smiles sheepishly.

  “Sully’s spaghetti is awesome! I can’t wait to dig in. We have beer and wine in the fridge if you want some, Logan. Or soda, if you don’t drink.” She walks over to the fridge and looks back over her shoulder at us.

  “Water, please.”

  “Me too. Just grab bottles if you want.” I gesture toward the second shelf when she opens the fridge.

  “Two bottles of water coming up, and one Sam Adams for yours truly.” She turns and displays her bottled beer like a The Price Is Right model. Logan and I laugh at her antics and grab our drinks when she sets them down in front of us.

  After we finish cleaning and loading the dishwasher, Logan and I head upstairs to my room. It’s time we sat down and discussed what is going on between us, and where it’s headed. I want to secure our relationship before I discuss the twilight zone with him.

  I shut and lock the door and turn to face him. He’s sitting on the loveseat at the foot of my bed, looking around my room.

  “This place came fully furnished,” I tell him. I don’t want him thinking this lavish furniture is my standard of living. From what I can tell, money is not a problem with Logan, but I don’t want him thinking I have it in spades as well.

  He nods and pats the cushion next to him for me to sit. I cross the floor and take my place next to him. He wraps his arm around my shoulder and gently pulls me back against his chest. He shuffles his legs up under me and positions me between his legs with my back against his stomach. His fingers run through my loose hair. I let it down after work, so it’s really wavy from being braided all day. His long fingers sink to my scalp and knead all my troubles away. He is so good with his hands. My scalp tingles with pleasure.

  “What do you want to know?” His hands continue their pleasure assault, and I release a deep breath and settle into him.

  “The truth. All of it.”

  “That could take all night. How about I tell you the basics, and we’ll work from there?” His fingers move to my temples and stroke tiny circles and then move over my scalp. The notion that he is too skilled with his hands brings about a bitter taste when I imagine those fingers pleasuring another woman in any fashion. Before I lose my nerve, I blurt out the most important thing that is bothering me.

  “I need to know something.” His fingers pause.

  “Anything.” His answer is exactly what I wanted to hear.

  “I want something from this. I want you. I don’t mean in the physical sense, although that has kept me awake several nights…I digress.” I smile up at him, and his lips are twitching with amusement. “What I mean to say is…”

  “I feel it too.” Four words. And my entire world feels whole again. The burning ache in my chest recedes, and my breath comes easier. Oh, thank goodness. He’s mine. All mine. His fingers start rubbing my scalp again and playing with my hair.

  “So we’re exclusive? Monogamous?” I ask it out loud to clear any doubt.

  “Yes, and yes. Is that all you wanted? Because I thought you understood when we were in Virginia that you were mine. I take care of what’s mine, Sulwen.” I can feel an ear-to-ear grin spread across my face, and I don’t even try to mask it because he can’t see me.

  “Thank you.” My voice is shaky with emotion, but I manage without crying.

  “Sulwen, you have nothing to thank me for. I was so worried you would think I was crazy or that I used our connection to trap you. You cannot possibly imagine how hard it was to tell you all of that after the weekend we had just had. I never planned for this, but I embrace it, mo mhuirnín.”

  “How many languages do you speak?” His fingers trail down my bare neck and beneath my tank top.

  “Three. Why do you ask?” I jump as he pinches my nipple through my satin bra.

  “Just…curious.” My breath is coming faster as his fingers slide farther down to my belly and back up over my now aching breasts.

  “Curious is good. Very good. How about I show you something? I promise you’ll like it.”

  His hands are trailing down my bare arms and then scoop around under me. In one swift move, we’re up, and he’s carrying me to the bed. When he lays me down, he pulls two condoms from his pocket and sets them on the nightstand. I smile up at him and open the small drawer to reveal a box of them inside.

  His brows rise in surprise and wiggle wickedly at me. “Optimistic, aren’t we, Miss Macgregor? I’ll have to see if I can satisfy your naughty appetite.” He chuckles and leans over to undress me.

  He pulls my yoga shorts slowly down my legs while following his movement with sensual kisses to my toes. Next my shirt is pulled up over my head and then my bra. I’m lying in nothing but black lace panties. And I am staring up into soulful green eyes.

  “You are so beautiful, Sulwen.” His eyes are shining with adoration when he leans down to kiss me softly. His lips are moist and soft. His tongue tastes like spices from dinner. I reach up and pull him down onto me.

  He pulls back to look at me. “Do you trust me?” I nod. “Good.” He leans down and tugs my nipple with his teeth before getting up and walking to my dresser. “Where are your scarves?”

  “Top drawer on the right,” I reply without thought. Then it dawns on me what else is up there. Oh, shit!

  Logan turns around with a face-splitting grin, holding my…you guessed it, Magic Dolphin. In his left hand is my tube of lubricant. He wiggles them like he has struck gold and carries them back to the bed with a handful of my scarves. Before I know what he’s about, he folds one of the scarves over and over until he has a makeshift blindfold.

  “Close your eyes,” he says, and then he gently places the black silk over my eyes and ties it securely behind my head. I can feel a slight push of air, so he must be waving his hand in front of my face to see if I’m peeking. I can’t see a thing.

  Apparently satisfied, he gently guides me back on a pillow. I can hear the sheets moving as he clears the bed. The bed dips as he moves about and situates me to his liking. I am flat on my back, and I feel a scarf around my left ankle. I pull it, but my movement is restricted as I realize I’m tied to the bedpost. Another silk tie fastens around my other leg, and I freeze. I’ve never been tied up before, and a moment of panic hits me. Next he secures my wrists in the same fashion.

  “Be still.” His lips brush against the top of my foot. He moves up the bed and ties my wrists in the same fashion. I am completely at his mercy. I feel helpless and incredibly vulnerable, but I keep reminding myself that this is Logan. He’s proven to me time and time again that although his methods are sometimes questionable, I can trust him. He always has my best interest at heart. We laid our feelings bare and here he is—trusting me to trust him.

  This is my man, and he is going to do naughty things to me, and I’m going to love it. I release a deep breath and relax.

  “That’s my girl. Just relax, baby. I’m going to make you feel so damn good.” I hear him walk across the floor, and then the muted light peeking in around my blindfold disappears, and everything is black. Pitch-black.

  Clothes rustle, and then the bed moves as he climbs in.

  Long fingers brush against my flesh. Then they’re gone.

  My heart rate picks up. My breathing becomes shallow. It’s black all around me, and I hear his husky breath hovering over me. My womb clenches tight. I slide my tongue over my suddenly dry lips.

  He groans. Heat…there’s so much heat building in me. Soft, wet lips press against my hipbone as his tongue swirls tiny circles. Then it’s gone. I’m starting to pant. My body is winding tighter and tighter.

  Hot liquid skims across my clitoris. Nimble fingers start to massage, and I nearly come undone. Up, and down, but so achingly slow that I push my hips up, begging for more.

  “Please.” I’m over the edge with need, and he’s just getting started. He pinches my clit and then rubs over it with the pad of his thumb. At least that’s what it feels
like. I can’t really tell anymore. I am lost to his fingers as they stroke and tease me to a fever pitch. Then they’re gone.

  “No. No. No. Please, Logan.” My hips are wildly twisting within the limits my bindings allow. The soft silk pulls against the skin around my ankles and wrists as I lose myself to the burning need within.

  “Shh.” Warm breath blows across my breasts. My body recedes as I succumb to the sweet agony. He dives and takes my nipple into his mouth in one fluid move, and I shudder. The air lumps in my throat, and I gulp to catch my breath. He sucks so hard, but when his teeth nibble tiny little bites over the tip, I groan from the sheer ecstasy that assails my body.

  I feel it building deep within. Tighter and tighter against my back, my belly, my very womb.

  He moves to my other nipple to deliver the same erotic torture. His hands glide down my sides and to my hips. He squeezes and then slides his hands in and down toward my groin.

  My body responds, and I instinctively shove myself into the heel of his palm. His other hand moves back and around my ass. He squeezes and continues his path between the cleft and on down. My body clenches, and I immediately freeze.

  “Trust me.” His voice is guttural and sexy as hell. I release a deep breath and relax to his touch.

  He moves his palms in circles over my clit, and it snaps me back. I moan and start to grind myself against him.

  “That’s it. Does that feel good, baby?” My body is tingling all over, and words are lost to me. I don’t have to see him to know that he has that dark, sensual grin on his wicked face. His other hand moves again and finally settles against my moist opening.

  I’m so ready for his touch I nearly come when he gently pushes his fingers inside me. I expect him to move, but he immediately stops, and then his mouth is on mine and his tongue is shoving in over mine. Taking. Giving. I want to wrap my hands around him so bad it is driving me mad with desire. His fingers plunge deep, and my body jerks so hard that the silk bindings bite into my skin. I am so lost to this maddening passion he stirs in me that I barely even notice.

  He pulls back and kisses the corner of my mouth, my nose, and my cheeks. And his fingers never stop their magnificent torture. My clit is on fire from the circles his palm is working over my sensitive nub. His fingers are swirling inside me, rubbing my sweet spot in just the right way.

  “Oh…God. Feels…so…good!” I can’t contain myself. I’m jerking and pulling at my bindings and grinding against his palm while he thrusts his fingers into me with wicked precision.

  His mouth covers mine again, and I shatter into a million pieces. My eyelids flash white as I squint through my orgasm. “Logan!” I scream his name, and he swallows my breath with a fiery kiss.

  His fingers leave me pulsing so hard it’s nearly painful. Then with a quick rip of foil and a slight movement above me, he thrusts deep and hard into my channel.

  “Fuck!” He yells as his hands bear down on my hips, and he pounds into me. Another orgasm seizes my body. My muscles contract until they feel as if they’ve been plugged into an electrical outlet. My skin is crawling, muscles pulsing, and I’m coming so hard I scream out in panic, fear, and sheer bliss. The ridge of his cock continues to press against my G-spot again and again until I’m floating on a sea of sensual pleasure, and then Logan slams into me, and I feel the heat of his seed flood within me.

  “Sulwen!” He groans and then slumps down over me, his hands on either side of me, holding his weight, his face lying over my heart.

  Sweat trickles down my neck. My body is tingling all over with tiny aftershocks jolting through my erogenous zones. He raises and kisses the place over my heart. “A chroí.” He kisses the spot again, and my heart stutters and then kicks back into rhythm.

  My blindfold is removed, and although it’s still dark, I can make out his silhouette. His smile holds such warm affection that I find myself returning it in spades. His thumb runs over my cheek and then my ear before he leans down and kisses me. His lips are so soft and yet firm. He pulls back and leans over me to untie my hands. Then he slides down to my ankles and frees me.

  His hands work each leg to loosen my muscles and check for bruising. He is looking at me with a single purpose. He wants to make sure he didn’t hurt me. His eyes narrow, and he checks every square inch where I was bound. Seeming satisfied, he looks up at me and grins slyly. He is so cute when he is like this. He has feelings for me, but he is trying very hard to mask them. I can see through his glamour though. His eyes are the window to his soul. If I look hard enough and really pay attention, I can see him. The real Logan. My Logan.

  I sit up and stretch my shoulders, relishing in my afterglow. Logan is putting the toy and scarves away now. He never used my Magic Dolphin. Humph. Maybe next time. My inner diva is wickedly grinning. I pull the sheet up over me and lean back against the pillow. Logan walks back toward me butt naked and without a care in the world. His stomach is ripped. My favorite part is the V just to the inside of each hipbone. It’s a chiseled indentation that I want to run my tongue up. I’ll have to store that thought for next time.

  I look over to the wastebasket and see that he’s already discarded the condom.

  His cock is still partially hard, so it makes for an impressive sight as he draws near. I don’t know how that fits in me, but I’m eternally thankful. I bite my lip to keep from smiling. He is so damn gorgeous, and he just rocked my world. God, I think I love this man.

  Logan crawls into bed and pulls me to him. I curl into his side and lay my head on his chest. The slow beat of his heart relaxes every muscle in my body. I feel myself sinking into him as my breaths grow deeper and deeper. And then I remember those two words he said after our lovemaking: “A chroí.” I briefly wonder what that means before I sink into the darkness.

  The next morning we have a delicious breakfast that Tonya has graciously picked up from the local IHOP. We all eat in comfortable silence and then get ready for the day. I have several errands to run, and as much as I love spending time with Logan, it has become increasingly clear to me that I need a little space to process everything that has happened between us.

  I feel myself casting glances at him and find him staring back at me with open curiosity. He wants to know what I’m thinking. He wants to talk. I can tell by the thread of electricity that is constantly thrumming between us. His feelings and thoughts pass to me through his eyes and are so easily decipherable that I clear my throat and lower my eyes to my plate of buttered pancakes. My appetite suddenly lacking, I shove my plate aside.

  Tonya looks up as I clear my plate and turn toward my room. “Aren’t you going to have any strawberries?” Her voice is uneasy, and I know she’s trying to figure out what is going on but is too respectful to question me in front of Logan.

  “No. I’m taking a shower,” I toss over my shoulder. I keep walking up the stairs. I hear her and Logan chatting as I shut my door and lean against the cool oak. I thump my head back a couple times, trying to knock some sense into myself. What the hell is wrong with me? I’m so confused! When I’m making love to Logan, everything seems so clear and natural, and then…this! It’s like I’m holding a grenade in one hand and the pin in the other, just waiting for the explosion to rock my world and blow it all away.

  It’s times like these that I miss my dad so much it physically hurts. I can hear his deep, reassuring voice telling me to take deep breaths and reassess. He was always there when I felt unsure of myself and the world around me.

  A tear skids down my cheek, and I quickly wipe it away with the back of my hand and sigh. I push myself off the door and walk to the bathroom. I need the steam and hot water to soothe my worries.

  When I look into Logan’s eyes, I can see there is so much he wants to say. So much he needs to say, but he holds back. The growing tension is like a rope that is slowly fraying as the days pass. Last night was amazing in so many ways. I wanted to shout my feelings to him, but as powerful as they are, my instinct is to withdraw and protect myself. I’
m vulnerable with him. He can hurt me like no one else, and that is terrifying. Too terrifying to contemplate right now.

  The shower eases my tense muscles. Feeling soundly resolved that I need to trust Logan and embrace this bizarre world he painted, I finish getting ready. I pull on some khaki capris and a deep purple tank top, swiping my hair into a neat ponytail and leaving my room to find Logan.

  He’s lying on the couch, flipping through the channels on our plasma screen TV. He looks so relaxed and at ease that I stop and watch him for a moment. His forearm flexes as he raises the remote and flips through the mess of reality and cooking shows. It’s still early, and on Sunday morning there is rarely anything worth watching.

  I step forward, and he halts his search to sit up and face me. He looks at me with an unreadable expression. My eyes rake over his solid form. He’s wearing his clothes from last night, and he looks absolutely divine. His hair is disheveled, and his face has a slight golden shadow from his beard growth. I want to run my tongue over his jaw and feel the stubble. Immediately I feel a pulse kick between my heating thighs. I don’t know how he does this to me, but it’s like a drug that I’m finding myself hopelessly addicted to.

  “We need to talk.” His voice is somber. I walk over to the couch and sit down next to him without touching him. Our eyes lock as he turns and draws a leg under himself and faces me. I nod nervously.

  “Listen, I know you’re scared and confused, and believe me when I tell you that I am too.” His eyes look pleadingly at me, and he takes my hands into his. “I have some pretty heavy stuff to tell you, and I know that it’s going to be difficult, if not impossible, for you to take it all in and still believe me sane, but I swear to you that I’m through with the lies.” His thumbs are stroking my knuckles, and I find myself relaxing into his touch with such easy familiarity.

  “Where’s Tonya?” I don’t know why the question comes out, but it’s the first and only thought I’ve had since setting eyes on him.

  He flashes a quick grin. “She left to run a few errands and give us some alone time. I think she thought we were going to fuck like bunnies all day and didn’t want to listen to us romping about.” His grin spreads into a full-on smile now, and I’m helpless to grin slyly back.